New From The House of Axebreaker

For everyone who wants to show their support for our new Norse Team - Aeslings United - The House of Axebreaker is proud to present our latest offering in fan apparel.

Modeled here, as usual, by the lovely Ms Alyssa Milano, this tee-shirt is a must have item for  FNF fans and supporters of the Norsa team's unique approach to a game they like to call Blod Skal.

FNF X Championship - Aeslings United Rd 2

Earlier in the week Aeslings United played the Nurgle outfit, The Bloodcurdlers,  in a 1-1 Draw.

The superior blocking skills of the Norse saw them injure 4 opponents, including killing 'the atrocious Shabrir', the Bloodcurdlers only skilled player.

As the team traded Touchdowns to level the score, the Norse whittled down the Nurgle numbers until only six Bloodcurdlers were able to take the field for the final kick-off. But an riot earlier in second half knocked time off the clock, allowing the Nurglites to hunker down with the ball in their own End Zone and wait out the clock.

A full replay of the match  is available on Cabalvision.

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

FNF X Championship - Aeslings United Rd 1

Earlier in the week Aeslings United played the Orcs of Bloodaxe Gringo's - resulting in a 1-1 Draw.

It was a hard fought but rather unremarkable game that resulted in a couple of minor injuries, a couple of TDs and the completely predictable failure of the Orc passing game!

Both teams., nevertheless, can be well satisfied with their overall performances and both will be lining up with a full squad for next week's matches.

A full replay is available on Cabalvision

The Norse winning were sufficient to pay for the passage from Norsa of their tardy tribal shaman (known as an Apothecary in the fancy circles of the FNF- la de da) . Which means the coaching staff won't have to close their eyes every time one their lightly armoured players get hit!

Dave
(aka Axebreaker)

Friday Night Fights X

All the teams are now entered! 

To help players remember who is who this season The House of Axebreaker has prepared this handy guide:

And with all the teams now offically registered and the draw complete, Tiny Manero has once again put on his dancing shoes to announce the start of Friday Night Fights X!

The draw for Round 1 of the Championship is:

Division 1

Drakeular Delicious Evil (DaE) v (Cha) Fist Pump Rapax_

Givo Volcanic Vultures (Amz) v (ChD) Sultan Wanders Supercoach

Moraiwe La Serenisima (Elf) v (Nec) The Lupine Lunatics Chopper

Division 2

Axebreaker Aeslings United (Nor) v (Orc) Bloodaxe Gringo's  Justorius

Zenthaalx The Bloodcurdlers (Nur) v (KhD) The Kardashians Jernau

Big-A The Legions of Doom (Und) v (WoE) Pan's Panthers Nestyr

The first round is scheduled to be completed by Thursday 23 May - which gives everyone a week and half to settle in.

Good Luck

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

FNF IX - Player Awards

FNF IX - The Trophy

Stay tuned for all the excitement, glitz and glamour of the

FNF IX Player Awards.

Published on Monday night.

FNF IX Grand Final

Season IX came down to Plumbers Karak Blues verses Harlequins FC

Bookmakers across the Old World offered long odds on the Elves. But the Harlequins rose to the occasion and - despite the best efforts of the Dwarfs, their Wizard and the occasional Elf falling flat on his face with the ball - they, remarkably, emerged victorious.

It was exciting and close fought game - fully deserving of the 20/20 awarded by Bastard & Claws  the Match Rating Agency. The Dwarfs played a very strong game with plenty of Guard and Tackle and to keep the Elves at bay. But their Runners' inability to pick-up the ball at several key moments cost them dearly.

A full replay of this, and all the other Harlequins games, is available through the miracle of Cabalvision.

Thanks to everyone for a great season - and good luck in Season X!

Dave
(aka Axebreaker)

FNF IX Cup - Semi-Finals

Four teams - Plumbers Karak Blues, Harlequins FC, Serpentine Slaves and GrimGav's Gladiators progressed into the finals.

First Semi-Final: A Dwarf verses Orc match is always going to be a fiercely contested, grinding game and the first Semi-Final was no exception. With both sides fielding Wizards there was also an electric atmosphere added to the match. The Dwarf managed to score the game's only Touch Down and progress to the Grand Final.

Second Semi-Final: In contrast to the other Semi-Final, this game featured two teams able to move the ball at high speed down the pitch - Elves though the air and the Chaos Dwarfs atop the four legs of their Bull Centaurs. The Harlequins won largely through the efforts of their pair of Blitzers who showed no hesitation in hurling themselves at the mighty Greasehoof Smokeybull. Despite the odds, the plucky duo hit the Bull Centaur four times and never once came off second best.

Thus FNF IX came down to a contest between the Dwarfs and the Elves.

Dave 

(aka Axebreaker)

Harlequins FC FNF IX Cup - Rounds 8 and 9

The House of Axebreaker recently upgraded our entire publishing and PR enterprise (bought a new PC). As a result, we fell way behind in our match highlights.

However, that all behind us, so here are the highlights of the final two rounds of the regular
FNF IX season.

Round 8 was a close fought match against the Undead of Victimus. Coach Justorius can count himself very unlucky not have come away with a draw as his Ghoul, Tamerlaine, stumbled on the line and his team just couldn't get the ball back in the dying seconds of the game.

Round 9 was a must win encounter for both elves and their frenzied Khorne opponents Conflakes. But the Conflakes were let down by the erractic performance of the usually fearsome Khorne Demon - Puff the Magic Dragon. Puff spent much the game  so excited by the propect of smashing weak little elves that he often couldn't decided which one to hit and spent too much time just standing there in wild indecision. 

These two late season wins catapulted Harlequins FC unexpectedly into second place and a berth in the Semi-Finals.

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)