Seasons Greetings

Hi all,

Tiny Manero has put on his Santa suit and hung his stockings over the fire place - so Christmas must be just around the corner.

Have a great Christmas and a good New Year and I'll see you all on-line in 2012.

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

FNF VI - Round 9 Completed

Greetings Blood Bowl Fans,

Another round of the FNF VI has been successfully completed. And it was another exciting round. The stand-out game being the 7-0 win recorded by the Wood Elves of Passing Fancy. Establishing a new FNF record - and one that will difficult to beat!  The other 13 teams in the league combined to scored an additional 18 TDs - for a total of 25 TD for the round - equaling last week's season high. But  let's not forget the casualties! There was a total of 29 injuries from all causes - including three Deaths!! And it was another good week for Cabalvision with all but one game uploaded and available for viewing.

Here are Jim and Bob with their selection of some of the best highlights from this week's games.

And a big thanks to all Coaches for completing their games this week!

Round 10 has begun and, as mentioned last week - due to the Christmas break, there is no fixed end date for this one. Hopefully, we can get every game done by sometime in the first week of January. Please contact your opponent as soon as possible to start planning when you are both available to play your game amid Christmas commitments and holiday plans :)

I will be out of town (and away from my PC) from 23 Dec-2 Jan inclusive. So I won't be able to validate games etc.

Good Luck

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

Dark Elf Draw

The Har Ganeth Blades had their first draw of the season last night in a brutal 1-1 tie against the Orcs of Uruk Ho!

While the game finished up as a draw - the Dark Elves can count themselves lucky to walk away with the Competition Point. Some poor decisions by the Orcs really deprived them of the victory they fully deserved. An Orc Blitzer forgot to Blitz just before Half-Time, depriving the Orcs of a certain TD and only a failed (and somewhat gratuitous) Orc pass allowed the Blades to score mid-way through the second half. 

But if the result on the scoreboard was even - that was not the case in the casualty count. With Dark Elves suffering 6 casualties (including an Apoth'd Death and two Serious Injuries) and 4 KOs to the Orcs none! Strangely, the match stats list 8 casualties for the Dark Elves - which was not the case!?! A full replay of the match is available on Cabalvision.

Thanks to Phil for the game - he was terribly unfortunate not win this one - and good luck with the rest of the season

Dave

(aka Axebreaker) 

Squaring the Circle

A Guide to Better Understanding Disturbing Presence

Another Community Service announcement on behalf of the House of Axebreaker

Over the last few weeks while watching the replays of FNF games on Cabalvision - it stuck me that the graphic Cyanide uses to represent Disturbing Presence [DP] can be quite misleading.

The DP rule states:

 "... any player must subtract -1 from the d6 when they pass, intercept or catch for each opposing player with Disturbing Presence that is within three squares of them, even if the Disturbing Presence player is Prone or Stunned."

Cyanide have chosen to represent the presence of this skill with a sickly green circle that has a hazy outline and looks like this:

But "within three squares" is actually a 7x7 square that is not at all well represented by a circle - especially on the diagonals. The true area-of-effect of DP in the above example is considerably bigger than that indicated by the graphic. DP actually covers the area shown below by the green square:

No doubt Cyanide would argue that it is not intended to be a hard-and-fast template, but a symbolic representation of the skill for aesthetic purposes only - just like other mutations such as Extra-Heads, Extra-arms, Tentacles, Foul Appearance etc are depicted graphically. And while this is a reasonably plausible argument -  it can, nevertheless, still be quite confusing. Especially in the heat-of-the-moment of a game where coaches have to make a whole bunch of decisions within the 2 minute time-frame. 

To further illustrate this - here is an actual example from a game played this week between the Disease of Drakenmoor  and the Erengrad Easybeats. 

The Easybeats thrower, #6 Helmut Rosulver, picks up the loose ball [1], runs down-field and attempts a Quick Pass [2] to #3 Seneschal Fentleberry [3].  Rosulver appears to be in the clear and well outside the hazy green circle of Disturbing Presence generated by the prone Nurgle Warrior, #1 Vlad Malaria [4].

Helmut Rosulver rolls a 2, but uses his Pass skill to re-roll, and rolls a 3. Enough for the pass to normally succeed (4+ modified by +1 for a Quick Pass) But (as shown below) a tell-tale blue Disturbing Presence icon appears above Vlad Malaria that indicates there was actually an additional -1 due to DP and the pass scatters.  

As illustrated below by the green square, the graphic depiction of DP by the hazy green circle was a poor indication of the actual area-of-effect of the skill. Had Rosulver moved instead to the square to the right (next to the sideline) and attempted the pass - it would still have been a Quick Pass and would have succeeded. 

So, the bottom line is, that while green circle and haze effects of the Disturbing Presence graphics might look good - it is not an accurate indicator of the area-of-effect of this skill. 

I recommend that you use the "G" hot-key to bring up the grid squares and manually count them off yourself if you want to try to pass or catch the ball anywhere near an opponent with DP. At least the graphic does give a clear indication that an opponent has the skill  - and that's a lot more than you get when facing other skills that can cut short your brilliant TD play - such as Pass Block or Diving Tackle etc. Conversely, I'd also recommend using the "G" hot-key if you have a player with DP and want to move him into the best possible position to seriously mess with your opponent's throwing game.

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

FNF VI - Round 8 Rolled!

Hi Blood Bowl fans,

Round 8 of the FNF league has been completed! It was another action packed week with a season record of 25 Touch Downs scored. There were also 28 casualties from all causes - but, sadly for the crowds that filled the stadiums this week, there was just the one death. It was also the best week to date for Cabalvision coverage with all games being broadcast and available for viewing!

With just five games left in the regular season, everyone's thoughts are starting to turn to the finals  Although at least one Coach thinks there is an "unassailable group of 5" that has a lock on the four semi-final positions - don't forget that most of these higher ranked teams are composed of squishy, lightly armoured players - so there is still plenty to play for and every team has a chance to have a big impact on the season's final outcome! 

Here are Jim and Bob with their selection of some of the best highlights from this week's games. 

The calendar has just been rolled and Round 9 has begun and is, in theory, scheduled to run until late Thursday night 22 December. But, as Christmas is fast approaching, there will be plenty of flexibility in the duration of the next couple of rounds. It would be great if we could complete Round 9 before Christmas - so all coaches are strongly encouraged to contact their opponent soon as possible - and we'll see how we go :)  

Round 10 will not, obviously, begin until all the Round 9 matches have been played and will  hopefully be completed sometime in early January. I will be out of town (and away from my PC) 23 Dec - 2 Jan inclusive. 

Good luck to all,

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

Dark Elves Win Another

The Har Ganeth Blades began, what is hopefully, their long climb out of the cellar last night with an emphatic 4-1 victory over the Traitors of Valhalla.

While the Dark Elves again managed to avoid the appallingly clumsy plays that characterised the team's performance earlier in the season - the scoreline had less to do with their performance and a lot to do with the shocking luck of their Norse opponents. Two of the Blades Touch Downs came from simple Norse passes that went astray and third from a Blitz on the Kick-Off at the start of the second half! A full replay is available on Cabalvision.

The impressiveness of the scoreline was somewhat off-set by injuries that will see the Blades two players short for next round's encounter with the Orcs of Uruk Ho!  But the 60,000 gp purse collected at the end of the match does mean the Dark Elves can afford to hire a new player to fill the spot left by the death of their Blitzer, Gáen Scaros two weeks ago. The team is remaining tight-lipped (or are just indecisive) regarding who the replacement will be - but rumor has it they are canvassing widely and interviewing a number of novice Blitzers, Assassins and Witch Elves for the vacancy.

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

Commissioner e-incommunicado

Hi all,

Apparently Telstra is having a massive problem with it's e-mail system - I haven't been able to send or receive e-mails since yesterday afternoon. And, according to the Bigpond website, this problem may well continue until at least tomorrow.

So, if you need to contact me regarding the FNF - phone or text me on 0402 926 442 or you can use the "Comments" option to this message on the FNF Blog page.

Dave
(aka Axebreaker)

FNF VI - Round 7 Complete

Hi there FNF Fans,

Another week has gone by and another round of the FNF has been completed. And what a week!  In addition to 19 TDs scored - this round was by far the most violent of the season with 31 casualties from all causes - including a season high five fatalities! So, if you like watching some on-field carnage, tune into Cabalvision where all but one of the matches is available.  

As usual, Jim and Bob are here to present their selection of some the best highlights from the week.

This week also saw the return of coach Qman to league as he kindly steps-in mid-season to take over The Fluffy Pussy Cats from the late great toldorn.*

Round 8 has been rolled and is scheduled to run until late Thursday night 15 December

Good luck everyone,

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

* "late"? Actually, he's not really dead. "great"? Okay, okay - the whole statement was a complete lie!

Dark Elves Actually Win

The Har Ganeth Blades won their second game of the season last night with a convincing 2-1 victory over the Morrowdale Mountain Men.

In a very welcome reversal of form - the Dark Elves put on a near flawless performance in last night's game. They didn't drop or fumble the ball once during the entire game and there was none of the usual clumsy falls when dodging away from their opponents. They even won the Biff with the Dwarf team now two players lighter as the result of a death and a crippling injury forcing an early retirement. A full replay of the match is available on Cabalvision.

The heavy armour and robust constitutions of the Dwarfs meant that Silent Steel enjoyed little success with his new "two-for-one" stabbing technique - but the Blade's assassin is reportedly very much looking forward to next week's game against the much less well protected Norse.

Thanks to Givo for the game - the Dark Elves' luck has to change from time-to-time and unfortunately for him it was this week -  good luck with the rest of the season. 

Dave  

(aka Axebreaker)

Round 6 Done

Hi FNF fans,

The sixth round of the sixth season has just been completed. As usual it was an action packed week with teams scoring a combined total of 20 Touch Downs. Casualties, however, were at a season low of just 19 from all causes - but that did include two deaths to keep all the more blood-thirsty fans quite happy. Once again, it was another good round for Cabalvision subscribers with all but one match broadcast on the premiere Blood Bowl channel.

Here are Jim and Bob with some of the best of this week's highlights.

Round 7 has begun and is scheduled to run until late Thursday night 8 Decemeber.

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

Dark Elves Lose Again

The Har Ganeth Blades lost their fifth match of the season last night - defeated by The Erengrad Easybeats 2-1

In what has become an all too familiar pattern -  poor ball handling derailed several offensive drives and turned the ball over to the opposition. To make matters worse, the Dark Elves most promising Blitzer, Gaén Scaros, was fatally injured - so bad were his wounds that the Apothecary's attempts to revive him completely failed. A full replay is available on Cabalvision!

Once again, the only bright spot was provided by the assassin, Silent Steel, who has improved his knife-work to the point where he now feels confident on being able to stab two opponents at the same time.

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

lizard vs gobbo's

Well a contest that was always gonna be interesting was made even more interesting by a game played entirely in sweltering heat.

Unfortunately the lizards didnt handle the heat well reduced to 5 or 6 players on the pitch for at least three of the kick offs due to heat or failed knock out rolls. The gobbos on the other hand were almost impervious to the heat. And well couldnt do much wrong.

Two blitzs on the kick were won by the gobbos and in a comp glitch the skizards had no fan factor when in fact it has 7. This obviously affected the kick off results. The trolls were awesome I think rolling stupid only once or twice all game. And most moves by the gobbos were effortless.

Success across the board was on the cards for the green skins!!!!!

The Lizards didnt stand a chance. Failing most things. Even the apothecary roll for a cas resulted in a dead as well for the Lizards showing they should never have even turned up.

Although one thing for sure is how on earth the izards only lost by 1. AMAZING!!!!!!

Yet agian a seriously injured player got the MVP and the only level up. But on the bright side the lizards got 50 000 in winnings!!!!! Nearly enough to buy some much neede muscle.

Round 5 Complete

Hi there Blood Bowl fans,

Round 5 of FNF Season VI has been concluded with all the action and carnage we've come to expect. A total of 21 Touch Downs were scored and there were 27 casualties from all causes - including 3 Deaths!! It was another good week for the Cabalvision network - with nearly all the matches available for fans of the game to watch and enjoy!

This week also saw the departure of one our Coaches - toldorn. Luckily Coach toldorn has left us with the key to the Chaos locker room  - so FNF Officials are working as we speak to find a new Coach to take over the reigns of The Fluffy Pussy Cats.

Here, once again, are Jim and Bob to present their selection of some the best highlights of the week.

Round 6 has begun and will run until late on Thursday night - 01 December.


Dave
(aka Axebreaker)

Hi allIm sorry to say this but I will be pulling out of this
season and probably every other season................I have had enough
of this blood games port forwarding issues (fucking french ort to be shot) and
am sick an tired of spending hours fixing this problem every time I want to
play.......I will be starting a good old fashioned board game comp with
kundy instead in the futuredI have probably forfieted 6 + games in last
2 seasons due to this problem and Im sorry to say Im going to fucking snape the
disk after writing this.........I forfieted to drakular ... sorry
mateToo all of you whom I have played over the last 6 seasons I wish you
the best and I am sorry for this but I have had enough of the program even tho
it has been fun lossing to you all for 5 seasons straight (lol) You will
be all sorry to loss the easy points from your comps but im sure you will all
have fun...Ps IF THEY EVER SOLVE THE FUCKING PORT FORWARDING ISSUE WITH
SOME UPDATE PLEASE LET ME KNOW BUT i HAVE LOST ANY PASSION I HAD FOR THE
COMPUTER GAME..... i AM GOING BACK TO THE BOARD GAME AND MAYBE BUY A FEW MORE
TEAMS......... At least I can throw the minitures at the opposition if I
lose......Thanks for the years of gaming and best of luckI hope
to get to cancon one year and meet you all...Ps If you want to find me
as Givo where to find the desertrat1941see ya alllThis message
and the blood bowl game will self destruct in 50 seconds
...........................BYE

Dark Elf Woes Continue

The Har Ganeth Blades put on another inept display last night - losing to the Elves of the Spirit Dragon Sky Masters 1-0.

It was a match that both teams would undoubtedly prefer to forget - the game was played in the rain which no doubt added to, but doesn't fully explain, the number of fumbles, fails and falls experienced by both teams. In fact, the so bad was the display that Bastard & Claws, the Match Rating Agency, gave the game only 8/20 - that is, the same score routinely awarded to unplayed Byes and Foffeits!!  The game's only Touch Down came just before half time when the Sky Masters finally managed to string together a series of actions without anyone falling over or dropping the ball!! A full replay is available on Cabalvision.

The Har Ganeth Blades coaching staff are in something a quandary - the team is good, the game plans are reasonably sound - but wins (even draws) still elude them. If they are not being Blitzed every second Kick-Off it, seems they can't handle the ball or dodge with any consistency. In this game, with 42% of d6 rolls this being 1s (and 58% being 1-2) - what can you do? (Besides start planning the early draft pick for Season VII) 

The bright spot in the game was the performance of the Assassin, Silent Steel, who had a great time stabbing elves left, right and centre. With 100,000gp in the bank - serious consideration is being given to hiring the second Assassin. At least a failed Stab doesn't cause a Turn Over :)

Thanks to Mick for the game - good luck with the rest of the season.

Dave

(aka Axebreaker)

Hi Friday Night Fights Bloodbowl Fans!

 You can call me "Secret Spy" but to be fair I'm really just a Couch Potato!

Week 4 - My Cheeto Review!  This week 6 out of 7 games on Cabal Vision for you to enjoy!

After the review this week I thought we would take a look and see how your favourite team is going!

HAR GANETH BLADES vs MORGUE MACHINE

Blocking

This week saw the Dark Elves of Har Ganeth stop the Morgue Machine juggernaut in its tracks beating them 2-0.  It was a hard fought match with both teams inflicting 2 injuries.  Let's see if the stats give us an inkling into how the game transpired...

% of Successful Block Rolls

Blades             - 56%

Morgue            - 40%   Hmm the picture is becoming clearer...

Skulls Average = 16.66% 

Blades             - 13 (18.30%) 

Morgue            - 9 (11.25%)

POW

Blades             - 15 (21.12%)

Morgue            - 9 (11.25%)

Average armour roll  Average = 7.00

Blades             - 7.08             

Morgue            - 6.67

MORROWDALE MOUNTAIN MEN vs URUKS HO

Blocking

Last week the dwarven Morrowdale Mountain Men were flogged by the Undead but the fans wanted to know if they could bounce back against the Orcs of Uruks Ho?  NOT A CHANCE!  The Orcs smelled the blood in the water this week and came out all fists swinging...catching the dwarves with their pants down and beating them 2-1 at the same time as inflicting 4 casualties to nil and killing one dwarf outright!  The Orcs were too good on the day!

% of Successful Block Rolls

Mountain Men - 43%

Uruks Ho         - 64%

Skulls  Average = 16.66%

Mountain Men - 12 (16.21%) 

Uruks Ho         - 10 (10.20%)

POW

Mountain Men - 6 (8.10%)      ...the Dwarves offended Nuffle somehow!

Uruks Ho         - 21 (21.42%)  ...while the Orcs were smiled upon

Average armour roll    Average = 7.00

Mountain Men - 6.77            

Uruks Ho         - 7.89               ...they found the way past the dwarves tough armour and will no doubt sell the                              info to other teams for a hefty price!

TURNER CHAINSAW MASSACRE vs ERENGRAD EASYBEATS

Blocking

The human Erengrad Easybeats easily countered the secret weapons of Turner Chainsaw Massacre to beat the goblins 2-0 in front of the goblins home crowd who were not at all pleased!  The Goblins inflicted 2 more casualties this season against 1 dished out by the Easybeats.  The Biff seemed pretty even from my cheeto stained chair...so lets see what the stats tell us!

% of Successful Block Rolls

Chainsaw        - 62%

Easybeats       - 62%   Wow dead even in the Biff...I knew it was close but not THAT close!

Skulls   Average = 16.66%

Chainsaw        - 6 (13.04%)   

Easybeats       - 6 (9.67%)      ...Easybeats had the luck here

POW

Chainsaw        - 10 (21.73%)  ...Chainsaw had the luck here

Easybeats       - 6 (9.67%)

Average armour roll  Average = 7.00 

Chainsaw        - 7.00             

Easybeats       - 6.85

  

PASSING FANCY vs TRAITORS OF VALHALLA

Blocking

The Wood Elves of passing Fancy kept the winning streak going by beating the Norse Traitors of Valhalla 2 -1 in a nail biter! One inflicted injury each with ball possession going to the Norse 62% to 32%.  It seems Passing Fancy were just too good on the day!  Let's have a look at the stats! 

% of Successful Block Rolls

Fancy              - 46%

Traitors            - 46%   ...wow both teams pretty unlucky in the biff.  No wonder only 2 injuries!

Skulls   Average = 16.66%

Fancy              - 9 (18.75%)             

Traitors            - 16 (13.91%)

POW

Fancy              - 8 (16.66%)

Traitors            - 24 (20.86%)

Average armour roll Average = 7.00

Fancy              - 6.79                          

Traitors            - 6.76     ...wow both teams well below average.  Again no wonder only 2 injuries!

  

SPIRIT DRAGON SKY MASTERS vs DISEASE OF DRAKENMOOR

Blocking

Could the Elves of Spirit Dragon Sky Masters bounce back from last week's poor effort ?  Could the Disease of Drakenmoor stop Nuffles wrath and finally get some runs on the board?

Well both team came in with high hopes but it was the elves who turned the hopes into a reality smashing the Nurgle team 3-0.  The Nurgle fought back dishing out almost twice as many blocks...but out of 115 blocks managed only 1 casualty!  On a positive note the Nurgle didn't suffer a death this week...the first time in quite a while!

% of Successful Block Rolls

Drakenmoor    - 71%               ...Both teams meant business this week!

Spirit Dragon   - 72%

Skulls  Average = 16.66%

Drakenmoor    - 15 (13.04%)             

Spirit Dragon   - 9 (14.28%)

POW

Drakenmoor    - 10 (8.69%)

Spirit Dragon   - 27 (42.85%)              ...the highest POW % so far this season!

Average armour roll  Average = 7.00

Drakenmoor    - 6.27                           

Spirit Dragon   - 6.89               ...both teams well under average accounts for the lack of injury

FLUFFY PUSSY CATS vs HEFFS HOTSHOTS

Blocking

Wow 2 teams I've wanted to see for a while now...both going head to head.  Could the Amazon babes of Heffs Hotshots keep the Chaos Fluffy Pussy Cats at bay?

In a word...no.  The Chaos came out on top and try as they may the Amazons couldn't seem to place a foot squarely on the ground.  The Cats could only manage to pick the ball up 50% of the time, however the Hotshots only made 4 from 10 catches while failing dodges over 50% of the time - for a team with dodge the coach must have been pulling his hair out! Still the stats weren't that lop sided and a good solid win to the Pussy Cats!

% of Successful Block Rolls

Pussy Cats      - 49%

Hotshots          - 78%               ...wow the Biff went the way of the Hotshots

Skulls  Average = 16.66%

Pussy Cats      - 13 (14.77%)              

Hotshots          - 5 (15.62%)

POW

Pussy Cats      - 24 (27.27%)

Hotshots          -7 (21.87%)

Average armour roll  Average = 7.00 

Pussy Cats      - 7.23                          

Hotshots          - 7.03 

Team Rankings and Couch Potatoes much anticipated review on each team and whether to back them into the finals:

Passing Fancy                                   4-0-0    12                    Supercoach

With a Guard, a strip baller and 2 wrestlers all ready, the team are set to not only make the finals but to stamp their ownership on the whole season.  Sure Supercoach is the highest paid coach...as well as the most unattractive in the league...but 4 wins from 4 starts shows why every cent in your purse should be backing this proven coach and his proven team

Erengrad Easybeats                         3-1-0    10                    Justorious

Human teams can be so...well so average in so many ways!  Justorious is a seasoned coach and under his guidance the team has failed to lose a game this season.  With 2 Guards a tackler and a mighty blow on his side don't let the name fool you...the Easybeats will be there at Finals time!

Lizard Skizzards                               3-0-1    9                      Kornes Killers

Some said that Coach Korne wouldn't be able to control the Lizards after specializing with Orcs.  But let's face it some players are fat and strong, some are weak and skinny...and they are all green!  The only difference is one has scales...and they are the ones sitting at number three on the rankings after 4 weeks.  With 2 Catchers, a blocker and an Agility increase you could consider them a safe bet on making the finals from what we have seen so far this season!

RUN Dangermouse Club                 3-0-1    9                      Big-A

With 2 Blockers, a Guard and a Kicker this team isn't surviving on speed alone.  They have won the scrimmage and are showing off a new side to a team often referred to as soft and squishy.  With just 11 players can Coach Big A keep the team in one piece long enough to make the finals or will they suffer the same fate as last season's Skaven team?

Morgue Machine                               2-1-1    7                      Drakeular

Sure he is grumpy...and stays drunk most of the time, but so would you if you had as many trophies as Coach Drakeular!  A proven winner when the going gets tough he has managed to win half his season so far and going off last week's game his team are ready to rumble.  Undead can be a formidable opponent and under this Coach Id expect to see them make the finals or die trying!

Traitors of Valhalla                           2-1-1    7                      Shol Va

Last season Coach Shol Va spent most of his time in dark corners whispering dark secrets with dark elves.  This season he is drinking beer with the Norse Men and has only suffered one loss from 4 starts out on the field.  The fresh air seems to just what he needed!  If you want to doubt his ability to steer these traitorous brutes to the finals then do it on your own time, because Im liking what I am seeing from this team!

Uruks Ho                                            2-0-2    6                      Jernau Morat Gurgeh

They are Orcs...how good can they be?  Well after watching them thump the dwarves into the dirt my answer has to be REALLY GOOD!  Coach Jernau has the team on track and with Mighty Blow, Tackle and Blockers all about expect these green skins to fight to the death each and every week!

           

Spirit Dragon Sky Masters              1-2-1    5                      Zenthaalx

A slow start has seen the Sky Masters struggle to get a foot hold on the season so far.  Coach Zen whips himself like a crazed squig each year he fails to lead a team to the finals.  Sure they are ranked at number 8 now, but bet your life they will gather momentum over the next few weeks!  With a Guard and a Block Dodger don't underestimate this elven team or its coach!

Morrowdale Mountain Men             1-1-2    4                      Givo

This coach does a lot of talking but with only one win under his belt is it all hot air?  This tough dwarven outfit has been embarrassed 2 weeks in a row by being out muscled.  Can they bounce back and smash the teams that come before them?  If you want to bet on this team don't go using my money!

Turner Chainsaw Massacre            1-1-2    4                      Ahriman Ormuzd

Most fans love the Gobins!  Let's face it they always lose but they are cute in an ugly kind of way and the chainsaws and grenades add a real spice to a game of Bloodbowl.  By selecting a Friday Night Fights winning coach in Ahriman, the Goblins are no walkover this season and anyone doubting their temerity can stand in the scrimmage and see it firsthand!

The Fluffy Pussy Cats                      1-0-3    3                      Toldorn

Chaos takes a while to warm up due to all those extra arms and tentacles that pop out of every Chaos players spare orifice.  Coach Toldorn has the teams skills coming in now and as the league progresses so will their ranking.  Can they settle down quickly enough to make the finals?  Time will tell!

Har Ganeth Blades                           1-0-3    3                      Axebreaker

A strong coach...a strong team...strong backing from now disappointed sponsors! What gives here people?  With only 1 win so far some are asking if Coach Axebreaker is too old to be coaching any more.  Personally i think he is...but that won't stop him from whipping his dark elves into an occultist frenzy as they gain momentum.  Can his team survive injuries to make the finals?  Im not foolish enough to bet against them!

The Disease of Drakenmoor           0-1-3    1                      Beldenox

Whenever a Nurgle team takes the field in Friday Night Fights other coaches shake with fear.  They fear the mutations...the strength and the disease.  But so far these followers of Chaos have failed to deliver having players die each week and getting the back hand from all who they come up against.  Coach Beldenox knows his way around a Bloodbowl field and once Nuffle leaves and Nurgle arrives we will see some special things from this team...mark my words!

Heffs Hotshots                                  0-0-4    0                      Zelithian

When Coach Zelithian was signing up the girls (while they gave him a foot massage and a back rub!) they promised they would have both feet on the ground.  Unfortunately they can't seem to put both feet down firmly at the same time...tripping and sliding all over the place like a scared rabbit on a hot grill.  Fans are waiting to see how these girls progress...provided they live that long!  With a Guard, a Strength Increase and a Kick off Returner don't write them off yet...there is still plenty of time to go!

Until Next Week...Halflings like Pie but Stats Don't Lie!

Secret Spy

Hi Friday Night Fights Bloodbowl Fans!

You can call me "Secret Spy" but to be fair I'm really just a Couch Potato!

Week 3 - My Cheetos Review! (sorry its late but Cabal Vision blew a fuse and threw me behind!  Round 4 Results will be out shortly...)

This week I got my first fan mail and I thought Id share with you all the great feedback

Feedback 1: Hi Couch Potato, my name is Nancy Girlyblouse and Im a big fan of the Passing Fancy Team! I just wanted to say that all your stats can be read in different ways so don't mean a real lot when you look at it. 

Reply: Hi Nancy, thanks for reading my newsletter!  I appreciate your feedback and will ensure from now on my Blocking area will be a lot more descriptive to give you a real feel for how the Biff went in each game.  Oh, I also noticed that in Round 6 Passing Fancy are playing the Morrowdale Mountain Men and I hope the dwarves head butt all your prancy elves into a mushy paste...especially your pin up players!

Feedback 2: Hi Secret Spy my name is Cyril Prance-about and I've supported the mighty Spirit Dragon Sky Masters since their very first game.  I love your stats but was hoping you could put down the averages next to the stats in future?

Reply: Hi Cyril, its great to see another Elven fan following my Newsletter with such gusto!  I agree that it would make it a lot easier to understand the stats with the averages close by and from now on I will do it!  Its great ideas from my fans just like you that help to make this newsletter so successful!  This will no doubt help all the elven followers out there who are either blind or have the IQ of a Squig!  Oh and I saw your team are playing the Disease of Drakenmoor next week...I hope your favourite players have all their wobbly bits rot and fall off!

Please keep the great feedback coming in! 

Anyway, let's get down to the game results!

DISEASE OF DRAKENMOOR vs RUN DANGERMOUSE CLUB

 Blocking

Well the Run Dangermouse Club won the game 2-1 over the Disease of Drakenmoor by handing out a walloping! With 4 unanswered injuries to nil, plus 2 deaths the rats from run forgot the running game plan and opted to dish out a little rough justice.  Still with half the team dead or in the apothecaries room the team did well to keep the scoreline so close.

% of Successful Block Rolls

Drakenmoor    - 48%

Dangermouse - 59% (Bring it on bad boys!)

Skulls Average = 16.66%

Drakenmoor    - 12 (12.24%)    

Dangermouse - 13 (16.04%)

POW

Drakenmoor    - 19 (19.38%)

Dangermouse - 14 (17.28%)

Average armour roll Average = 7.00

Drakenmoor    - 6.75               

Dangermouse - 7.17 (this proved to be the big difference as the ratties ripped through armour like it was made of cheese)

HAR GANETH BLADES vs PASSING FANCY

 Blocking

This week Passing Fancy won convincingly 3-1 over the Har Ganeth Blades.  With only 1 injury and no deaths it was a pretty disappointing game. With 6 passes and almost 200 yards running you can get a picture of how the game was played...typical elf on elf action! The Fancy knocked the dark elves over 6 times and 3 of these were knockouts...so they know how to hit hard!  The Blades got one KO and one injury out of 11 knockdowns...wooses!

% of Successful Block Rolls

Har Ganeth     - 68% (how did they not win the biff count hands down?)

Passing Fancy- 46%

Skulls  Average = 16.66% 

Har Ganeth     - 13 (17.80%)     

Passing Fancy- 11 (14.86%)

POW

Har Ganeth     - 15 (20.54%)

Passing Fancy- 10 (13.51%)

Average armour roll Average = 7.00

Har Ganeth     - 6.46  (...oh that's how!  They couldn't work out how to get through the armour!)

Passing Fancy- 7.29               

URUKS HO vs ERENGRAD EASYBEATS

 Blocking

This week saw the Erengrad Easybeats for the first time and with a 3-1 win over the Orcs of Uruks Ho we liked what we saw!  The Orcs dished out the injuries 3-2 while they also out passed the humans.  This didn't stop some great play and tactics allowing the humans to take the green skins down convincingly despite Nuffle influencing the outcome to a large extent!

% of Successful Block Rolls

Uruks Ho         - 57%

Easybeats       - 79% (get a load of that % !!)

Skulls Average = 16.66%

Uruks Ho         - 18 (18%)      

Easybeats       - 7 (11.86%)

POW

Uruks Ho         - 13 (13%)

Easybeats       - 18 (30.50%)  (Almost 1/3 of all rolls were POW's - BRING IT ON !!)

Average armour roll  Average = 7.00

Uruks Ho         - 7.17              

Easybeats       - 6.71

MORGUE MACHINE vs MORROWDALE MOUNTAIN MEN

Blocking

Well the Undead of Morgue Machine did a number on the Morrowdale Mountain Men as they kept the stout ones scoreless winning 2-0. Even when the undead had the game sealed they stalled, fouled and may as well ate frog legs!  This however added to the game as the dwarves were ready to unleash some pain of their own...the undead just didn't give them a chance! (Nor Nuffle as we look at the stats for that matter...)

% of Successful Block Rolls

Morgue            - 62%

Mountainmen  - 46% (Pack of girlies!)

Skulls Average = 16.66%

Morgue            - 19 (16.66%)              

Mountainmen  - 21 (25.92%) (sheesh 1/4 of the block rolls were skulls)

POW

Morgue            - 23 (20.17%)

Mountainmen  - 11 (13.58%)

Average armour roll  Average = 7.00

Morgue            - 7.24                         

Mountainmen  - 6.94

TURNER CHAINSAW MASSACRE vs SPIRIT DRAGON SKY MASTERS

Blocking

Round 3 saw the Goblins of Turner Chainsaw Massacre draw 1-1 with the Pro Elf Spirit Dragon Sky Masters.  The Gobbo's dished out 4 injuries to 1 showing the rest of the league they might be small but their weapons are sharp!

% of Successful Block Rolls

Chainsaw        - 53%

Spirit Dragon   - 28% (Lowest this week...probably the lowest % ever recorded!)

Skulls  Average = 16.66%

Chainsaw        - 20 (22.47%)             

Spirit Dragon   - 11 (17.18%)

POW

Chainsaw        - 11 (12.35%)

Spirit Dragon   - 8 (12.50%)

Average armour roll   Average = 7.00

Chainsaw        - 7.36                         

Spirit Dragon   - 5.15  (What the??  Were the Elves wearing padded gloves? - Even Halflings hit harder than that!  What did the elves do to upset Nuffle?)

Until Next Week...

Secret Spy